Oceans

So this is a less funny, cute or fun project that I like post, and more of a spiritual one. Just giving you fair warning, no entertaining Mason anecdotes today. šŸ™‚

This past year has been kind of rough. Not to be a complaining Catherine, but its been hard. Life is hard, parenting is hard, work is hard. Marriage. Is. Hard. I’ve been on quite a journey over the past 18 months, a journey of faith and love and trust and sometimes hate and anger and lots and lots of tears. I’m not anywhere near done, but I do feel like I’m at least making some headway. Which is further along than I ever thought I would get!

I’m working on posting more about the entirety of this experience, but lets be honest, ain’t nobody got time for that. At least not right now. But I’m keeping careful notes, and I’m hopeful that someday soon I’ll be able to share all that I have learned. But for now, I wanted to share a song that has been especially meaningful to me. I’m kind of obsessed with Hillsong United, and just randomly one day as I was listening to my Hillsong Pandora, this song played. Its called “Oceans”. I am telling you its so beautiful I stop what I am doing every single time I hear it and usually cry at least at some point during the song.

You call me out upon the waters
The great unknown where feet may fail
And there I find You in the mystery
In oceans deep
My faith will stand

And I will call upon Your name
And keep my eyes above the waves
When oceans rise
My soul will rest in Your embrace
For I am Yours and You are mine

As I hear these lyrics, I am so struck by the simplicity of the truth here. God calls me out upon the waters where feet may fail, God knows I’m probably going to struggle, and he’s saying my faith will stand? Is he sure? I mean really, MANY times over the past year my faith was not standing, I was not standing, I was barely breathing and literally aching for something, anything I could do to make my situation better. And then here comes my favorite part, “I will call upon your name, and keep my eyes above the waves”. All we have to do is call upon Jesus and keep our eyes on him, and our souls will rest. Our souls can rest because nothing can separate us from the love of God. Not heights nor depths, nor anything in all of creation, not my situation, not my lack of faith, not my unbelief, and not my struggle to trust a God who is watching while I suffer things I do not understand. That is rest.

Your grace abounds in deepest waters
Your sovereign hand
Will be my guide
Where feet may fail and fear surrounds me
You’ve never failed and You won’t start now

So I will call upon Your name
And keep my eyes above the waves
When oceans rise
My soul will rest in Your embrace
For I am Yours and You are mine

As if I wasn’t already convinced, these next two verses just really drive it home. His grace abounds in deepest waters. Think about that. We hear all the time “His grace is sufficient for you”, at least I do. But what does that mean? It means this, when you’re in it, I mean really in IT deep, so is his grace, there, abounding, waiting for you in deepest waters. His sovereign hand will be my guide. He’s never failed, and He won’t start now. I have to remind myself of this over and over again. He’s never failed, and He won’t start now. These are truths, not just words. On a good day, these are things my heart clings to when I am hurting and angry and struggling to make sense out of life.

And then my obsession with this song continues with my absoluteĀ favoriteĀ part.

Spirit lead me where my trust is without borders
Let me walk upon the waters
Wherever You would call me
Take me deeper than my feet could ever wander
And my faith will be made stronger
In the presence of my Savior

This is my prayer. Spirit lead me where my trust is without borders. Let me walk upon the waters, wherever you would call me. Take me deeper than my feet could ever wander, and my faith will be made stronger in the presence of my Savior. This is where I want to be, I want to be praying a deeper trust, a deeper faith, a deeper love than I would ever stumble upon on my own, even if I could. Because of the truths of the grace and mercy and kindness of God we can trust him. He’s never failed, and He won’t start now.

xoxo

jess

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One thought on “Oceans”

  1. Jess, thank you for the wonderful reminder. I find myself taking my eyes off our Savior to look at the snakes around my feet. I really needed this this morning. I am so proud of you!

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